In a Word . . . Drive

As our roads get set to welcome intelligent cars, which way should we steer?

The arrival of driverless cars cannot come soon enough for such as me. Although, as seems likely, it does not mean people will no longer have to learn to drive. From the look of things, safety and insurance will insist on it. Just in case. In time that may not be necessary, but probably late for me.

By then I shall have returned to the great nothingness – heaven, hell, purgatory, earth to earth. Commenting on the hereafter, a man I knew once said he didn’t mind whether he ended up in heaven or hell as he had friends in both places. Whichever, he is with them now this many a year.

I do not drive. It astounds people when I say this. But it is true. In fact I believe that no one living in a city needs a car. In the urban context it is just an expensive nuisance. What with parking, parking costs, clamping, being stuck in traffic jams . . . . fie on’t! (to quote Shakespeare). I am living proof that you don’t need a car in the city. I have never had one.

Non-driving hero

It is quite possible to get around using public transport and taxis. I’ve done it here and elsewhere. Everywhere. People like me should get awards because of our low carbon footprint.

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People like me should get special tax allowances for our contribution to making the atmosphere safer for all. We help stop floods, storms, climate change. Does anyone notice? Do they what!

Admittedly, if I resided at my little grey home in the west, I’d have to learn to drive and get a car. Otherwise my life would be one of less-than-splendid isolation.

As it is, on my regular visits to that still centre of the universe I am dependant on the kindness of family, friends and strangers to get about. Public transport in that part of the world is as regular as visits by Halley’s comet.

Besides, I dislike long-distance bus travel not least since this summer. I took the bus to Derry, stopped in Monaghan for coffee, knocked it all over my lap as soon as the bus took off and sat in the cooling wet for another 90 minutes – having no choice – before arrival at Foyle bus station.

Drive: "to guide, steer, propel", from the Old English drifan

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