Lead singer of the rock band Aslan, Christy Dignam, has said he is on a “conveyor belt up to heaven” since entering palliative care at his home in Dublin in January.
Dignam was diagnosed with amyloidosis, a rare blood disorder associated with certain cancers in 2013 and was told he had just months to live. However, he has now been fighting the disease for almost a decade.
Speaking in an interview with Ryan Tubridy on RTÉ Radio 1, which airs on Monday, the 62-year-old said when he was first diagnosed with cancer a decade ago, he prayed for “10 more years”.
“I remember praying. I was like, ‘Please, just give me 10 more years.’ And that 10 years are up now and you’re kind of saying, ‘I know I only asked for 10, but you couldn’t throw another 10 in there could you, yeah?’,” he said, adding that he “didn’t know” who he was praying to, because he is not religious.
[ Christy Dignam receiving palliative care at his Dublin homeOpens in new window ]
“Initially, I was so ill I could not confront it, it was hitting me in the face ... When they got a handle on the medication, I would live as if there was nothing wrong with me, and then when something debilitated me, I’d deal with it that day”.
“Anybody that got the cancer diagnosis would understand that denial,” he said.
Aslan, who formed in 1982 and became one of the most popular bands on the Irish music scene throughout the 1980s, 90s and in more recent times.
The band is best known for their hit Crazy World, a song Dignam wrote after his daughter was born.
Last September Aslan were forced to postpone what would have been the biggest concert in of their career in the 3Arena as a result of what was described then as a “setback” with the singer’s ongoing cancer treatment.
Dignam, who had been admitted to Beaumont Hospital, spent six months in the care of the haematology and cardiac care team.
Since December, the singer has been “at home and is being cared for lovingly by family, with the support of a palliative care team,” according to a statement from his family, released in January.
[ Christy Dignam has served Ireland in several important waysOpens in new window ]
Reflecting on his professional life in the interview with RTÉ, Dignam said he did not have any regrets about his time with Aslan, and he had “a brilliant life with them”.
Dignam’s father “never forgave” him for giving up a pensionable job to go full-time with Aslan. But, he said: “That’s what life is, isn’t it, taking these chances”.
“For the last two or three years it wasn’t going right with Aslan. The band were kind of drifting apart, the crew were starting to leave ... That’s why I ended up doing the solo album”.
The interview took place in Dignam’s home, where Dignam has a medical bed and is more comfortable.
“I was sitting here one day and I was looking out the window and this fella walked by the door. And I just looked at him and I thought you’ll never do that again ... you’ll never just go for a walk,” he said.
“That kind of sent me into a spiral thinking of all the things I’ll never do again ... It’s like you’re heading into an abyss”.
While he said he is not religious, Dignam said: “I believe we are all spiritual beings in some sense or other. I remember there used to be an old saying that ‘religion is for people who want to go to heaven, spirituality is for people who have been to hell.’ And I really identified with that, you know”.
“Because when you have had rough times, the contrast is so vast it helps you see the world in a more focused way, if you know what I mean”.
“Fear” is what jumps out to him when he reflects on his life, Dignam said, because “nobody wants to die”.
However, Dignam appears to have now accepted that he is going to die.
“I’ll go in here now and that’ll be the end of it,” he said.
The Christy Dignam interview will air on Monday from 9am on The Ryan Tubridy Show on RTÉ Radio 1.
