Of all the television trends we didn’t see coming in 2022, the BBC trying to reboot the 1980s action movie with Keeley Hawes in the lead role is right up there. That’s the pitch in Crossfire (BBC One, Tuesday, 9pm), in which Hawes plays a former policewoman with marital woes trying to enjoy her holidays when terrorists strike.
Hang on. Isn’t that the plot of Die Hard? Exactly — only instead of Bruce Willis crawling around in a bloodied shirt, Crossfire gives us holiday-makers gunned down by terrorists while Hawley’s Jo dashes about looking narked off.
Who are the bad guys? Why are they shooting innocent sun-seekers in a Canary Islands resort? Those explanations must wait until the concluding two episodes because part one asks us to invest not just in the massacre but in Jo’s complicated personal life.
Actually, her personal life isn’t all that complicated. Her husband Jason (Lee Ingleby) is a manipulative creep who enjoys putting Jo down in front of their friends. She also has a penchant for ruminating on the meaning of time via indulgent voiceovers that sound like out-takes from a freemium mindfulness app on your Android phone.
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Matt Cooper: I’m an only child. I’ve always been conscious of not having brothers or sisters
A Dublin scam: After more than 10 years in New York, nothing like this had ever happened to me
Patrick Freyne: I am becoming a demotivational speaker – let’s all have an averagely productive December
And yet the series gaslights us slightly because Jason’s paranoia about Jo is revealed to be justified, as she’s having an affair with one of the chums with whom they are vacationing. He’s annoyed. And continues to stew over Jo even with Uzi-toting terrorists running amok.
If you’re wondering why terrestrial broadcasters don’t do wham-bam action more often, well ... Crossfire has the answer. The BBC is good at a lot of things — nature documentaries, Royal Funerals — but goodness do the action scenes here come off as half-cocked.Underwhelming doesn’t begin to do it justice to a thriller
Underwhelming doesn’t begin to do it justice to a thriller scripted by Louise Doughty (Apple Tree Yard). Hawley looks in physical and existential pain throughout. The set has been packed with extras under orders to jerk about hysterically as if shot as soon as the sound of gunfire strikes up.
It’s enough to make you yearn for the gritty verisimilitude of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Commando or Sly Stallone’s Cobra. And also to wonder what the BBC has up its sleeve next — a remake of Rambo: First Blood Part II starring Adrian Dunbar?
Hawes is the real loser. Whether in the Line of Duty or Bodyguard, she has demonstrated that she can rise above pulpy material. Alas, she’s up to her neck in the silliness here and not even her committed performance can stop Crossfire missing the target.
