Gender-based violence is “an affront to human dignity, to equality and to the fundamental right of every person to live safely and freely”, President Catherine Connolly has said.
Speaking at the launch of the Women’s Aid Centre for Learning and Practice Development on Tuesday, the President said she has “never been comfortable with” the term domestic violence because it “minimises the horrific nature” of the crimes perpetrated.
The free online training is designed to help people better understand how to safely support someone who is being subjected to domestic abuse or coercive control. Members of the public can take the course, as can professionals who may encounter survivors of abuse in healthcare, work or other settings.
Ms Connolly said that, in the 51 years since Women’s Aid was founded, Ireland has “come a long way as a society in recognising, challenging and addressing the basic issues of domestic and intimate-partner violence”.
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However, she added that the number of people impacted by such violence remains “appallingly high”.
The event heard that one in three women in Ireland have experienced psychological, physical and/or sexual abuse from an intimate partner.
Jill, who spoke under a pseudonym, detailed her own experience of abuse at the hands of her former partner.
“My name isn’t important today, because I could be any woman you know, any woman sitting across from you in your clinic, at your desk, passing you on the street, a sister, a daughter, a colleague, a friend.”
Jill said her “journey to safety and recovery would have been so much shorter” if her family members and professionals she encountered at the time had better known how to approach the situation.
She said she “constantly” feared for her and her son’s safety.
“I slept in my clothes, ready to run at a moment’s notice. One night, I had to throw myself into a ditch to get away from [her partner]. And despite the cold and wet with the noise of rats rustling around me, I stayed there, afraid to make a noise in case he found me, so I could survive until morning.”
Jill spoke about a GP who prescribed her medication but did not ask if she needed help, despite knowing what was happening at home.
“She was too embarrassed to bring up the subject. I felt worse about myself when I came out of that appointment than when I went in. I wish she had said to me, ‘Are you okay? You’re not alone. There is help available’.”
Suzanna Knight, head of the Centre for Learning and Practice Development, said domestic violence is “rarely disclosed directly”.
“Victims often test the waters or wait for someone to ask or to create a space where it feels safe to speak. A trained professional recognises what it takes for someone to talk about what is happening to them.”
Ms Knight said families, friends and neighbours can also “play a critical role” in helping people. She said people should look out for signs, such as a person becoming more isolated or losing interest in their hobbies.
“Many victims disclose first to someone they trust – a friend, a sibling, a parent,” she said.
“Yet families often struggle with what to do. They may not understand the dynamics of abuse.
“They may urge the victim to leave, thinking that will stop the abuse, without recognising that leaving can be the most dangerous time and won’t stop the abuse.”
Tuesday marks International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women.
- Support is available on the Women’s Aid 24hr National Freephone Helpline on 1800 341 900 or at womensaid.ie
- Support for men: National Male Advice Line 1800 816588; mensnetwork.ie
