Ray Casserly: ‘Talking with friends and family made our minds up about moving home’
My wife and I have been thinking for a while about how much longer we wanted to stay in London, but it was talking with friends and family when we were back in Belfast and Meath for Christmas that made our minds up about moving home.
I have been in London for three years, and my wife for two. As great as London is, it doesn’t have the same community feel and family support network that you might benefit from, especially when it comes to having kids, which is where we are in our lives now. Brexit is also potentially going to have a very negative impact, not only economically but socially as well.
0 of 3
A lot of my friends are in construction. They all did the Australia thing when the recession hit and are back working in Ireland. Their sector is booming now, which is an obvious indicator that the economy is doing better. Employment opportunities for both my wife and I seem to have improved, too. In my field of international education, there is a lot of potential for growth in Ireland. My wife is a primary school teacher and there seem to be more jobs going in that area too, from what we can see.
We have made the decision to move home in July, come hell or high water, when this academic year is over.
Going back to London knowing this could be the last January we do so after Christmas in Ireland, there was a sense of relief, and accomplishment. We set out for London three years ago to gain particular things, and we feel we have achieved those goals. There’s also a sense of nostalgia; driving through London on New Year’s Day we felt a bit sad, looking at all the bright lights and big buildings. But now we have to prepare for the move home. We have already started packing our books!
Grainne Styles: ‘Christmas in Ireland can be stressful as it is magical and precious
We were greeted on arrival from Singapore by carol singers and shouts of “Welcome home!” in Dublin Airport. Every taxi driver still wanted to know our life story, and every long-awaited hug with a loved one felt like my last.
Our two-year-old son Paddy doted on all our family and friends, many he had met before but possibly not remembered. He loved spending time with his boisterous cousins, jumping into swimming pools, grappling how to use his new hurley and sliotar under their guidance, and eating “Ganny’s” home cooking together. He kicked heaps of dry leaves for the first time in Stephen’s Green, and chased a robin through my childhood haunt of Glengarra Woods in Co Tipperary.
Ireland is still as beautiful. I could stare at the Galtee mountains all day; the backdrop of my family home in Mitchelstown, Co Cork. My husband Rich and I took a jaunt down memory lane to visit Kenmare and Dromquinna, where we married and spent our first New Year’s Eve together eight years ago.
The epidemic of homeless people on the freezing streets made me shudder. Deserted housing estates serve as a chilling reminder of the recession. Bringing Paddy to light candles after Mass for our lost loved ones, I realised I was lighting more this year. There are too many great people we missed or didn’t have enough time with; an unwelcome stress to coming home.
It will never get easier to say goodbye. I still struggle to find an answer to the question of whether we will ever move back “home”. Christmas in Ireland can be as stressful as it is magical and precious.
Stephanie Doyle: ‘My daughter finally got to meet a lot of our friends’
My daughter Alice is only seven months old but this was her fourth trip back to Ireland from London. This Christmas visit was special, as she finally got to meet a lot of our friends. On previous trips, relatives were the priority, but I have spent a lovely few days this time with my girlfriends, some of whom have had babies too since we last met.
Before Alice was born, as soon as the flight would land in Knock, I would feel “home”, but this year it felt different. I don’t know where we belong any more – here in Ireland or over in London? Where does Alice belong? She has two passports. Is she Irish or English? I am not entirely sure.
When we moved to London five years ago, when my husband Paul got a job there, we said we would stay for two years and then think about it, but that time passed quickly and nothing changed. We still have no big plan to move home, but that’s not to say we will stay in London either. We are waiting to see what the impact of Brexit will be, as that might influence our decision, but for now we are going with the flow.
My Mum and Dad have three daughters and all three of us live abroad; my sister and I are in London, and the other is in Pennsylvania with her son Ben. It was very special for them to have two children and one grandchild home in Galway for the holidays. I’m looking forward to being back in our own apartment in Kent, and to our routine, which is so important with a little one!
Des Ryan: ‘Ireland seemed to be a more optimistic place this Christmas’
My wife Carol and I have spent the last nine Christmases in Australia. We’ve been there for more than 20 years, but we will never get used to wearing shorts and sunglasses on Christmas Day. It just doesn’t feel right. We have tried to create our own Christmas down under, it is not the same without our extended family and it can be a very lonely time.
I was looking forward to the simple things in Limerick this year: having family around, enjoying a pint with old friends and my mother’s cooking. The dark evenings are probably a nuisance for most people but there is something homely about them that I missed.
This year was particularly nice for my parents; as well as having us there, my brother Diarmuid moved home with his family after four years living in New York. There was also the additional treat for us of meeting a new niece, Phoebe, for the first time.
I left Ireland in July 1994, shortly before the boom. During those heady years there was great optimism around and people always questioned why we didn’t come back to live. When we visited after the crash it was the opposite. Everyone we spoke to said the country was ruined and advised us to stay away. Around Limerick where I am from, a lot of the shops were closed down and boarded up and there were fewer people in the pubs.
Ireland certainly seemed to be a more optimistic place this Christmas. Over the last couple of trips back, we have noticed an energy around again that had been missing during the recession. People seem more content and the outlook has definitely improved.
We have a few days to go before we start the long trip back to Sydney. The last days are always hard. My children Cormac (10) and Dearbhla (13) have decided they want to stay; it will take them a while to settle back in Australia again. I have toyed with the idea of moving back to Limerick with my family over the last few of years. This trip has proved it is a realistic option.
Sinéad Craddock: ‘Being at home only for Christmas breeds an appreciation of where you come from’
This Christmas was my third returning from overseas. The first two years I travelled home from Muscat in Oman, where I was teaching English. This year I’ve come from southeast Asia. Next year I’ll be hoping to make the slightly shorter journey from the Netherlands, to where I’m relocating in January.
“Sure nothing changes around here,” I’m told every year. But this isn’t true; I now walk past my old bedroom to the box room at the end of the hall. Aldi has opened down the road and new apartment blocks are flying up all over the place. I’ve started to sound like my mother, exclaiming “I remember when that was a field”. Friends are growing up, relatives are getting older. Evidently, some things do change while I’m away, but thankfully, Christmas at home is always more or less the same.
Christmas at home means tradition. It means watching the Coca-Cola ad on TV and listening to the same songs on repeat on Christmas FM. It means having new "Christmas jammies" to snuggle in. It means highlighting movies in the RTÉ Guide that we probably won't end up watching. It's about fitting in all the food that you can't get abroad – the Tayto, the real Irish Cadbury's chocolate, the rashers and sausages (especially if you live in the pork-free regions of the Middle East) and cup after cup of Lyons tea. Christmas at home means turkey, ham, roast potatoes, Brussel's sprouts, sausage stuffing and leftovers on St Stephen's Day.
Being at home only for Christmas breeds an appreciation of where you come from, because perhaps, like me, you didn’t realise how much you appreciated your starting point before you set out.
Róisín Farren: ‘The homeless situation is heartbreaking to see’
After a few Christmases spent eating barbecues in hot and sunny Melbourne with friends, this was my first Christmas at home in Ireland in three years. The two weeks flew by, spent with family in Dundalk and catching up with friends, many of whom were also home from afar for the festive periodor who have recently moved back from living abroad.
I was blown away by the magic of the Christmas lights this year, particularly around Grafton Street. The decorations just don’t look the same in the Australian sun. I was struck by how well Ireland seems to be doing overall. My friends are in good jobs now and many new shops and restaurants seem to have popped up around Dublin since I moved away. The Luas works appear no closer to being finished, though, and the homeless situation is heartbreaking to see on the streets of the city.
Leaving my parents at the airport is getting harder and harder to do and, although I love my life in Melbourne, being at home for Christmas has firmly planted the idea that I will be back home again soon, this time for good.
After our dear mum died suddenly in July 2011, our older sister stepped into the role of family focal point. My siblings and I owe her and her family a debt of gratitude we can never repay.
The rest of us returned home from abroad that first Christmas, to make sure Dad didn’t wake up in the house on his own. We spent time with him and tried to lift the sadness in his heart. We were glad of the opportunity. But fate waits for no man, and he died in February 2014. I haven't been home since his grave was finished.
But I went back this Christmas and I'm glad I did. I saw my siblings, I saw my nephews, I saw the dog, I saw some friends. I wanted to hug them, look at them, just be with them. Share a wry smile, go for lunch and argue over who pays the bill. Then hold down a gulp and gently run my hands along the smooth marble of the headstone.
I miss my parents every day and will always honour their memory. But it's time now to appreciate my siblings, and come home more often for Christmas.
IRISH TIMES ABROAD
After five years sharing stories about the Irish overseas, the Generation Emigration section of The Irish Times recently expanded into Irish Times Abroad, a dedicated site for Irish-born and Irish-connected people around the world.
As well as personal stories of living overseas and returning home, readers will now find more news, business, sports, opinion, culture and lifestyle content of special interest to those living outside Ireland, returned emigrants and anyone else with an interest in Irish emigration.
Our new Irish Times Abroad network keeps readers up to date with our stories by and about the Irish diaspora, lets them to contribute to our journalism and join conversations about issues they are interested in. For more information and to join the network, seewww.irishtimes.com/abroad.
Our current "flying visit" competition offers a chance for two people to fly from Ireland to see a loved-one anywhere in the world. Enter before midnight tonight at www.irishtimes.com/flyingvisit.
