It's usually a stopover on the way to one of India's beaches, but this vast, extraordinary city is worth a closer look, writes Bernice Harrison.
A week home from Bombay and a seriously fashionable friend has me in the throes of that cringey tourist terror that I may have travelled to a city and somehow missed it. "What about Tahiliani? He dresses Jemima Khan, you know. And isn't Ensemble the most amazing shop?" Then she started on how "directional" Indian fashion has been over the past few seasons - "the Courtyard, fantastic" - and how amazing it must have been to snap up all the good stuff at source for half nothing.
Well, no, no and no. I hadn't got to a single shop she mentioned, which, having suffered an 11-hour flight to get there, was a dismal realisation. Our guide - and you need a guide and transport for a short visit to a city as vast as Mumbai, as it is now officially called - was a rather sensible-looking woman who was either suffering from fashion tunnel vision or took one look at the motley crew of Irish journalists and thought there wasn't much chance of our turning into Khan or needing the same glam kit as Shilpa Shetty.
We did go to Fabindia, a sort of Avoca, snap up rather too many gold-trimmed rainbow-coloured salwar kameez and browse the chaotic street markets that line Colaba Causeway. Our biggest shopping excursion was to an ultratraditional fabric and shawl shop that would have been retail Nirvana had it not been stuffed with the most enthusiastic salesmen on the planet, who didn't so much hover as encircle you in a creepy, intimidating pincer movement if you showed the slightest interest in anything at all. I left the shop not with a bag of gossamer-soft pashminas but with a hot face and empty hands.
"It's all about personal service," said one of our hosts, Salim Patheria of Indian Dreams, a Dublin-based travel company. "That's the way shopping works in India. They expect to show you everything, but there's absolutely no obligation."
Sound advice, but talk to anyone who has been to the country and even the savviest traveller has to admit that no amount of cultural signposting - about shopping or anything else - can prepare you for the extraordinarily experience of even the briefest visit.
For most long-haul travellers, Bombay has been a stopover city, glimpsed as a name on a plane ticket on the way to one of India's more touristy beach destinations, in Goa or Kerala in the south, which might explain why the departure lounge at the airport features a section of daybeds occupied by sleepy, tanned travellers. The more adventurous might nip into the city centre to tick off must-sees such as Elephanta Island or the Gateway of India, but until quite recently that was that.
Then Bombay started popping up on lists of hot destinations. Readers of women's glossies have already lapped up endless stories about the lavish wedding party of Elizabeth Hurley and Arun Nayar. Time Out began publishing a guide to the city - a sure sign it's a hot place to visit - and several new hang-outs, including Indigo, a cool city-centre bar and restaurant, and Bed Lounge and Bar, in the upmarket suburb of Bandra, started appearing in international style bibles.
Bollywood probably has a lot to do with it. Studios around the city churn out more than 200 films a year, and the stars of Indian cinema are as big as anyone Hollywood has to offer - remember the outrage on the streets of India when Shetty was bullied on Celebrity Big Brother? Bollywood's popularity has spawned a travel industry, with behind-the-scenes tours of the studios a big draw for serious fans.
There's also a burgeoning generation of rich young Indians - hence the sudden appearance of coffee shops and chic bars and restaurants - who are enthralled by Western labels. Louis Vuitton has just opened a showroom at the Taj Mahal hotel, and the new shopping malls are filled with familiar brands such as Benetton, Mango and Tommy Hilfiger.
Our guide on our week-long trip - fashion nous aside - turned out to be superb, giving a flavour of the city. Highlights included the sight of the city's spectacular, though seriously dilapidated, 1930s architecture, a visit to Mani Bhavan Gandhi Museum and an inspiring tour around the Jain Temple and Elephanta Island.
The Indian ministry of tourism is pushing Bombay as a shopping destination, but, my fashionista friend's experience aside, it doesn't really work. Almost 500,000 people are estimated to live in each square kilometre of some parts of the city - that's a million per square mile - so strolling and browsing isn't an option. More to the point, this is an acutely poor city. At traffic lights our minibus was regularly surrounded by crowds of grubby, emaciated children carrying even smaller children begging for a couple of coins. A visit to Bombay gives a glimpse of another India - a commercial, thriving, urban and chaotic place - and that's as good a reason as any for beach-bound travellers to get off their airport loungers.
Indian Dreams organises custom trips to India, including a visit to Bombay, for from €2,200 a person, based on two people sharing, for a five- to seven-day trip, including flights, transfers and accommodation. See www.indiandreams.ie or call 01-2948412.
THE BEST OF BOMBAY
BOLLYWOODSeveral studios are open for daily visits - Indian Dreams organises tours as part of a travel package. Then go to a Bollywood film. Even the daytime showings will be busy at the Eros Cinema, in the city centre. It's in a beautiful 1930s art-deco building, crying out for sensitive restoration, but worth the trip.
ELEPHANTA CAVESThis hilltop Hindu shrine, on Elephanta Island, 10km from the mainland, is dedicated to Lord Shiva; extraordinary sculpted panels depict his life and powers.
MANI BHAVAN GANDHI MUSEUMA suburban house turns out to be an enchanting memorial to Mahatma Gandhi; it was the home of Mani Bhavan, one of his friends. The Father of the Nation lived there off and on from 1917 to 1934. His simply-furnished room is still intact, and one floor houses a fascinating depiction of his life though charming, ancient dioramas.
JAIN TEMPLEThe colourful, highly decorative temple in Malabar Hill, Bombay's most fashionable suburb, was built in 1905. Visitors must follow strict rules, such as entering barefoot and never turning their backs on the altars.
THE GATEWAY OF INDIABombay's most famous landmark is a huge arch built in 1911, in the Gujarat style, to commemorate a visit by King George V of England. This is where you get the boat to Elephanta Island. Then cross the road for lunch in the elegant, peaceful Taj Mahal hotel.