With the new college term set to start shortly, parents all across the country will be preparing for their independent young adults to fly the nest and move away to work, study or travel. It will be an exciting time, but it can also an emotional one, as the hustle and bustle of family life is tempered by the first, or possibly the last, child to leave home.
But, while they may have embarked on their first foray into the real world and are keen to throw off the shackles of their adolescent lives, most young people also want the reassurance and comfort of knowing that everything will remain exactly the same, whenever they decide to come home for a few days of pampering.
As parents of course, we welcome and long for their visits, but in many households, an empty bedroom could be put to better use for the weeks and months that their previous occupants are living elsewhere.
So, to ensure that this much-needed space is utilised, while also being mindful of not upsetting the fledgling students, how can you tactfully repurpose a child’s room so it can be easily transformed whenever they return?
Housing in Ireland is among the most expensive and most affordable in the EU. How does that happen?
Ceann comhairle election key task as 34th Dáil convenes for first time
Your EV questions answered: Am I better to drive my 13-year-old diesel until it dies than buy a new EV?
Workplace wrangles: Staying on the right side of your HR department, and more labrynthine aspects of employment law
Start talking
Sarah Petersen, of Dan Éire Designs, says having a conversation with your teenager is the first step as it is important for them to know that you would like to make a few changes, without taking away from the fact that it will still remain their bedroom.
“Make it a project that you both work on, so get their input on colour changes to the walls, some updated lighting and soft furnishings and reassure them that their favourite bed linen will always be used when they come home,” she says. “Treat your teenager to a few new accessories for both their new college space and their old teen room and encourage them to bring a few of their favourite items to their new place – this might also entice them to do a bit of decluttering.
“Create a memory wall or notice board for them where they can save some of their favourite memories from their childhood and clear out a section of the wardrobe to be used specifically for guests to hang their clothes when staying for a night or two, or if there is enough space in the room, add a freestanding clothes rail for guests – a space you can style with towels for their use and somewhere for them to pop their suitcase.
“Small changes will make the space feel more like a guest room, such as a new paint colour, some more sophisticated lighting, new bedlinen, a nice rug under the bed and clear surfaces. These will keep the room feeling fresh but will also allow your teen to come back whenever they like and enjoy their memory wall and still be able to store extra items in their own wardrobe.”
Interior design consultant Olive Treanor says some people may want to use their child’s room as a home office, and with more than 20 years’ experience in the industry, she says making the most out of every available space is the key to keeping everyone happy.
“Wardrobes are great for storing items which belong to the room owner who no longer lives in the house but comes for visits or weekends,” she says. “They could be also used for a concealed desk or even a dressing table and can help conceal clutter or work related paper. I think that custom-built cabinetry offers the most practical solutions to take advantage of the space available and wooden floors are the best option if the room is being used as a combined office and bedroom, but it can be softened with a rug to cover around the bed area.
“I would suggest keeping window dressings simple by opting for a Roman blind instead of curtains and also a keeping the walls a neutral colour. Then (if you want to also use the room as a guest bedroom) introducing an upholstered headboard in a linen or velvet fabric and a velvet bedspread and cushions will give a more luxurious feel.”
As a professional declutterer, Anne Marie Kingston, of White Sage Decluttering, says she has helped many clients to declutter rooms when their children have left home. She says the best way to transform a room is to get rid of some of the items that have been needlessly taking up space.
“Decluttering is a process and its important to get everyone involved so that items aren’t thrown out in haste as while some things may look like rubbish, there may be a connection or memory which is important,” she says. “Decluttering and letting go is like an onion – it has many layers and its a continuous process, so the first thing to do is to get rid of all old school books, copies and notes. Although some parents feel these notes might be handy for another sibling, they are seldom used.
“The same goes for old uniforms which can be recycled, even if they are ripped, faded or stained. Charity shops will send to a recycling company to be repurposed instead of filling up landfills and for every large black bag they receive, the charity shops get €5 per bag – but make sure to label with ‘Recycle Only, Not for Resale’.
“Old school and gear bags, as well as sportswear, can also be given away, recycled or given back to the local club or school to be reused.”
The decluttering expert says while some things have an emotional connection and can be stored, other items really do need to be thrown out.
“Keep bedroom furniture to a minimum with just a bed, two [bedside] lockers, a standalone wardrobe and a desk, if required – so clear out any broken furniture to the local recycling centre,” she says. “And now is the time to make a decision on the teddies and toys. Some older kids may not be ready to let go and that is fine, so just pick out their favourites and vacuum-pack them along with any other toys or items they have gathered over the years and don’t want to get rid of yet. Decluttering is a continuous process so while the first attempt might be small, the next could be bigger.
“Magazines and books can be passed on to family and friends or if they are collectors’ items, pop into a clear storage box and ask your teenager what they are planning to do with them. And if there are any musical instruments which aren’t being used, try selling them either online or to music shops and give music transcripts back to their teachers.
‘30-wear rule’
“When it comes to items such as make-up, shampoos and other products, anything unopened (and in date) can be donated to shelters or charity shops, already opened products used up and gift sets can be donated or even sold.”
The one thing that is always difficult to declutter is clothing as most of us have notions that we will wear certain items again, and teenagers are no different – but Kingston says that we need to be a bit ruthless as moving out of home is a great opportunity to get rid of old coats, jeans, jumpers and more.
“No matter what the age group, when it comes to wardrobes, it must be thought of in real time so all items are 100 per cent wearable,” she says. “So the first step must be to clear out any items which no longer fit or has any rips, holes or stains. It’s also worth questioning how many items are needed and if a new wardrobe is required for college.
“I am all for the ‘30-wear rule’ – so when buying something new, ask yourself if it will you get 30 wears and if the answer is yes, then buy it, otherwise leave it behind. By following this rule, you will have no mistake buys in your wardrobe. Also, you must be able to see everything in your wardrobe and hang clothing with one item per hanger (if not, then it’s time to clear some stuff out).
“And when it comes to excess jewellery, check the condition and if anything of good quality is broken, take it to the jewellers to be fixed or try and sell it. And if there is any cosmetic jewellery (which hasn’t been used in the last 12 to 18 months) group together in a clear storage box and as trends are changing all the time, and think about what you want to do with it.”
So, while it will be emotional watching your grown up children packing up for their new life away from home, see it as an opportunity to give their room a new lease of life – while still ensuring that it is always a refuge for them.