Once more unto the breach...
“Taoiseach, faced with implacable opposition, you will need to stand firm and not blink.”
No, this wasn't Frances Fitzgerald's final plea to Leo Varadkar to face down those ruffians in Fianna Fáil clamouring for her head on a plate.
This time it was Labour leader Brendan Howlin, urging him to stand firm under pressure from Europe and not to leap into phase two of the Brexit negotiations without getting a clear commitment from Britain on the "Irish question".
But as he sat in the Dáil chamber on Wednesday, having narrowly avoided plunging the country into a dreaded Christmas election after days of stubbornly insisting his Tánaiste should not walk the plank for serial forgetfulness and crimes against credulity, Brendan’s words will not have been welcome.
As Bertie once shivered, they were enough to send cold spines up and down his back.
“Stand firm and not blink?”
Yeah right, Brendan. That’s what he did last week and right on through until Monday, backing Frances to the hilt, until she had to depart anyway, leaving him looking naive and inexperienced.
And it’s why the leader of Fianna Fáil, Micheál Martin, the man who didn’t blink first, has looked deeply pained for the past two days as he concentrates every fibre of his being into a heroic effort not to look or sound smug.
It must be killing Leo.
On the other hand, with his leadership credentials having taken a battering over an excessively gung-ho approach to his first big political test, the Taoiseach's forthcoming trip to Brussels for a crucial European Council meeting might just be the thing to buff up his tarnished halo.
Border concerns
While a snap general election would have been viewed as a monumental inconvenience by the electorate, it was the prospect of him allowing domestic political turmoil to erupt during a critical stage for Ireland in the Brexit negotiations that angered and worried people the most.
Brendan Howlin was worried that matters could advance for Britain without meaningful progress on the Irish Border conundrum. He reckons that, with France and Germany prioritising the divorce bill and the rights of citizens above the Irish Border, "Irish concerns may well be brushed aside".
In order to keep the rest of the EU member states behind us, he told Leo, he must be prepared to make a moral argument along with a legal one. In this, a matter of national urgency, Brendan is very keen to pull on the green jersey and do his bit.
He asked the Taoiseach to meet fellow party leaders and “share your plans on a confidential basis” so they could discuss how best they could help in lobbying “sister parties and organisations throughout Europe to support a vital Irish position”.
The Labour leader sounded very passionate, and it was such a pity he didn’t hand around little tricolours so everyone could wave them as he made his clarion call.
Calling for a collective political effort, Brendan said all parties and TDs “should come together to show Britain and the EU 27 that we stand united together in the interests of our nation.”
Hurrah! That’s the spirit.
Leo said Ireland's team in Europe is playing a blinder and hardly a moment goes by without somebody getting on the blower to Michel Barnier for another reassuring chat about the way forward for plucky Éire. He doesn't think he'll even have to use his veto, there will be such support for his position.
But to be on the safe side, there’s no harm to covering all the angles.
Labour people could get talking to “socialists and democrats” in the institutions across the Continent, while Fianna Fáil’s representatives could get talking to the liberals “and so on so that we have a collective, joined-up and manifestly united effort on this vital interest for Ireland”.
Leo wasn’t bothered. He couldn’t manage a little enthusiasm for the Labour leader, who was speaking with the very best of intentions.
“Ah, sure we’re grand the way we are, Brendan, thanks very much, ” is more or less what the Taoiseach said.
Brendan looked crestfallen. Stung by Leo’s airy rejection.
No need for that, Taoiseach. He was only trying to help.
Although Leo was more than happy to talk about Brexit – any subject, really, other than the turbulent events of the last week. Garda overtime? Bring it on. Homelessness? Now where did he put those statistics?
Back to normal after a bruising encounter for his ego following a stand-off with Fianna Fáil brought on by another outbreak of whistleblower-related political shambles.
Two little girls
The real normal, outside of the frenetic chest-thumping and horn-locking of pumped-up politicians, was sitting in the visitors’ gallery.
We wondered who there were, these two little girls. One with a big bow on her dress and a little bow in her hair and the other wearing a furry orange helmet of a cat hat with big eyes and a fat nose and pointy kitty ears.
During questions on forthcoming legislation, a number of TDs gave the answer.
The girls were with their parents and in the gallery to highlight the fact they will soon lose access to a life-changing drug unless the HSE agrees to fund it for them. The TDs wanted the Minister for Health to meet them and hear their stories.
Grace McIntyre (9), from Leitrim, and Cezy Focsa (11), from Kilkenny, have Morquio syndrome, a very rare genetic condition caused by a failure to produce an enzyme. The drug Vimizim, an enzyme-replacement therapy, is the only known drug to treat the condition.
They began taking it in 2011 as part of a clinical trial and the manufacturers continued supplying it to them for free, but that stops on December 5th.
Unusual move
In an unusual departure, Simon Harris left the chamber and went up to the gallery to meet them and their parents and supporters. The little group chatted in an alcove outside, with the two girls putting their case.
Going on the drug was “like you’re in treacle all the time and then suddenly you’re not”, Cezy told him. “It’s like taking fresh water away from two human beings – it’s that important.”
“She says that to everyone” giggled Grace.
Cezy, from underneath her Kilkenny cat hat, had strong words for the Minister. "Objection!" she cried. "Why can children in Northern Ireland have this and children in the Republic of Ireland not?" Then she put on her really angry face, just to show him.
“We need to get you a job here,” said Harris.
The Minister assured them, and their families, that he would take up their case with the HSE. Only 15 people in Ireland have the condition. “I’ll do that today. I’m meeting them today. I promise, I’ll do that.”
