Madam, - Father Tom Ingoldsby asks "how can a state that is merely an expression of lust on the part of two men or two women be dignified with the title 'marriage'? " (July 22nd).
As he is, no doubt, celibate and has never formed a committed, long-term relationship with another adult, it would be worthwhile to point out that "lust" or sexual attraction forms a part in the establishment of most adult relationships.
For a couple like Diana Eck and Dorothy Austin to maintain and deepen their relationship over a period of 28 years, it takes a lot more than that. Like any other married couple, it takes love, forgiveness, shared values and experience. If they still lust for each other after that long, then I congratulate them.
Karen Armstrong and Father Ingoldsby both suggest that marriage has a spiritual dimension. For many people this seems true. But it should not be forgotten that it also has a civil dimension. Marriage in a church is optional, while the civil rights and obligations that come with marriage are not. In my own experience, most gay men and lesbians seek only these. - Yours, etc.,
MORGAN CARPENTER, Kilmainham, Dublin 8.
Madam, - Fine Gael is in a sad state when it produces a so-called "Civil Partnership" proposal.
Senator Sheila Terry said her political party "wished to help all stable and caring partnerships". She claims it does not represent an attack on the traditional family model.
But the traditional family, the majority of the population, will have to pay increased taxation to support these relationships whether they agree or not. This is dictatorship.
Senator Sheila Terry admitted that they had not worked out the financial cost. This aspect does not concern her because of her salary paid by the State (the taxpayer). It is significant that "Gay and Lesbian" groups were at the press conference to announce the proposal.
No doubt they, an insignificant minority, are the inspiration of this immoral and unnatural proposal. - Yours, etc.,
Mrs MARY McDERMOTT, Belgrove Lawn, Chapelizod, Dublin 20.
Madam, - Father Ingoldsby (July 22nd) seems to adopt a very un-Christian attitude to those wishing to live in long-term, exclusive, same-sex relationships. He takes what is a small part of any relationship, the sexual activity, and uses it to judge the entire relationship as being "merely an expression of lust". By that logic, a heterosexual marriage might equally be defined as lustful.
However, as St Paul reminds us "better to marry than to burn" (1Cor 7:9).
Father Ingoldsby would like that amended to, it seems, "better to marry than to burn; unless you are gay, in which case, just burn". He appears very sure that he knows the mind of God when it comes to defining the vocation to marriage.
The only thing I am certain of on this issue is that it is no help to anyone to judge and condemn those trying their best to lead a Christian life. - Yours, etc.,
PATRICK G. BURKE, Northbrook Road, Ranelagh, Dublin 6.
Madam, - In relation to Tom Ingoldsby's letter (July 22nd), I respect his own personal beliefs that he draws upon in his discussion of the vocation of marriage. However, I must take issue with the language he uses to express his view, and his un-Christian approach to respecting other people's values and natural way of life. Language evolves. Whether he likes it or not, the word "marriage" can now legally refer to the union of same-sex couples around the world including those in the US state of Massachusetts. Contrary to his opinion, this civil marriage is indeed a "real marriage", where two people have come to celebrate their union with friends and loved ones.
The use of his word "lust" to describe the basis of same-sex relationships is also problematical, un-Christian and hateful. How does he know? Is he speaking from experience?
I'm sure that it can be a basis, just as lust exists in heterosexual relationships. However, from my own experience, I know of many same-sex relationships based on love.
And what can be greater for the world than two people coming together to share their love?
I don't believe that Mr Ingoldsby's comments reflect the views of many Christians throughout the country, as his approach goes against many philosophies of Christianity.
Perhaps he could learn a thing or two if he opens his eyes and sees the love that is shared by thousands of same-sex couples across Ireland. - Is mise le meas,
PÁDRAIC WHYTE, Faughart, Dundalk, Co Louth.
Madam, - The opinions of Father Tom Ingoldsby on marriage and lust are as valuable as a teetotaller's opinions on wine or a bald man's opinions on combs.- Yours, etc.,
JOHN DUFFY, Clonfert Road, Kimmage, Dublin 12.