Milan's surrender of the European Cup two years ago remains so traumatic for Gennaro Gattuso he cannot bear to watch the full video of that night in Istanbul after he and his team-mates threw away a 3-0 half-time lead.
"You need strength and courage to watch the 2005 final again - the cup was in Milan's grasp that year yet at the end of the final it was Liverpool who held it," said the midfielder.
"I haven't seen the entire game. I refuse to see it in full. We don't talk of two years ago. We avoid the subject, although it is something we can't forget. We can never cancel that, it happened."
But Gattuso, highly influential in Milan's semi-final win over Manchester United at San Siro, added that the memory of the 2005 defeat would be "a stimulus to us all. Many lies were said after that game. They said we partied after 45 minutes and that hurts me. It gives me a rage and an energy to play."
Gattuso's rage might have been further stoked by observations from Steven Gerrard that he is "overrated", "all mouth" and "as scary as a kitten", but Gattuso's response is considered. "I won't answer these provocations," said the man known to his team-mates as the Pit Bull.
"At the moment he (Gerrard) is the strongest player in England. He is an incredible player. He is the symbol of Liverpool just like (Paolo) Maldini is for us."
Rangers' fans might also struggle to recognise Gerrard's description. Gattuso enjoyed what he regards as a formative year in his career at Ibrox Park under Walter Smith after joining them in 1997 at the age of 19. He also met his wife, Monica, while in Glasgow.
At Rangers he was not seen as a player destined for one of Europe's biggest clubs and, after Smith was replaced by the Dutchman Dick Advocaat, Gattuso returned to Italy with Salernitana in 1998 before joining Milan for £8 million in the following year.
Since then, even with the disappointment of Istanbul, he describes a career which includes winners' medals from the 2003 Champions League and Italian Cup, the 2004 Serie A title and the 2006 World Cup as a "dream".
Although Milan convincingly dispatched United, there is a feeling that Liverpool will pose different and potentially more difficult questions tomorrow night than the Premiership champions .
"Manchester United have lots of attackers, Liverpool are more of a team - they have different qualities from Manchester," said Gattuso. "When they are in difficulty, they look to hit a long ball. Manchester United play more. Liverpool are harder and more aggressive. They are a very compact team and play together. Tactically they are very, very good - they certainly know what they are doing.
"The team plays as the manager wants. They can make you play badly - that is their strength."
Guardian Service