On a long ago episode of QI, Stephen Fry posed the question, ‘Why don’t pigeons like movies?’ It being QI, Bill Bailey and Alan Davies fluted about for a couple of minutes with mock answers. They were more into German expressionism, reckoned Bailey. They only lived to be eight or nine so could only see U-rated films anyway, said Davies.
When it all settled down, Fry gave them the real answer. Pigeons would be bored stiff at the cinema because movies as we know them are shot at a speed of 24-25 frames per second. But a pigeon’s eyesight is so far advanced of a human’s that it would need 250 frames per second to be engaged by it. This is why you’ll never hit a pigeon with your car, no matter how hard you try. Essentially, life presents to them in slow motion compared to humans.
Or at least, compared to humans not named Jamison Gibson-Park. The Leinster scrumhalf spent his evening in Croke Park seeing everything before everyone else in the stadium. Throughout the hour when Leinster were building a lead for themselves, it felt like just about every phase of play was already completed in Gibson-Park’s head and he just hadn’t let the rest of us in on it yet.
He was relentless here, in full hen on a hot griddle mode from start to finish. And not just in attack either. With eight minutes left on the clock, he sprinted 60 yards from the shadow of the Hogan Stand to cut off a Northampton kick in the Leinster in-goal area. By then, his 32-year-old legs were clearly wearying but the gears were still whizzing upstairs.
Whatever about being a nightmare to play against, being on the same side as him must take a fair bit of getting used to. There is no down time with Gibson-Park, no letting the pint settle. At one stage around the half-hour mark, Leinster won a scrum penalty in their own half. If you watch the footage back, you’ll find that Gibson-Park was on the ball and looking for the tap-and-go before referee Mathieu Raynal had his arm fully extended.
That was him all day. The two early Leinster tries that established the direction of travel for the day were entirely his creations. For the first, Leinster had a penalty advantage for a good 30 seconds before Raynal whistled up. When he did, Northampton hooker Curtis Langdon made sure to accidentally-on-purpose get the ball stuck between his feet as Gibson-Park went ferreting for it.
For all the world, it looked like Langdon had bought those killer few seconds that would be the difference between there being the possibility of a quick-tap and Gibson-Park having to give the ball to Ross Byrne for a handy kick in front of the posts. Everybody presumed that’s what was on the cards – Leinster had had all the pressure in the opening 10 minutes and this was going to be their reward.
But the pigeon sees everything. Gibson-Park got the ball back on its mark and spotted James Lowe coming in off his wing. He was outnumbered two-to-one and so the pass was going to be risky. But the upside made it worth a go – Gibson-Park knew that if he hit Lowe in stride, the force of his momentum would make him favourite to score. The pass was glorious, arcing and dipping right into Lowe’s chest a few metres out. He couldn’t not score.
Their second came four minutes later and again it was a Gibson-Park production. An attacking lineout devolved into a scramble for the ball on the cusp of the tryline and it looked like anyone’s until Gibson-Park put manners on it. A volleyball tap took everyone out of the picture and left Lowe with nothing but a kneel-down to score his second.
Nobody in the ground imagined that Leinster would make such hard work of things from there. They went 15-0 up and were 20-3 ahead coming up to the hour mark. To go from that to having to win a lineout in the 80th minute to secure their spot in the final was sloppy stuff. A few missed kicks, a few missed tackles and the whole thing got far closer than it needed to.
That said, Gibson-Park was pretty blameless. His work-rate never dropped, his sniffing out of chances that weren’t obvious barely let up even as he tired. He even engineered what should have been the sealing penalty on 62 minutes, selling a dive that Raynal bought. Byrne was having a bad day off the tee though and the game stayed in the balance.
Ultimately though, Leinster saw it out. Lowe finished with a hat-trick of tries but it was no surprise that Gibson-Park was awarded man of the match. Watch James Lowe and you’ll see the scores. Watch Jamison Gibson-Park and you’ll see the game.
You won’t see what he’s seeing, though. Only the pigeons are in that league.
- Sign up for push alerts and have the best news, analysis and comment delivered directly to your phone
- Find The Irish Times on WhatsApp and stay up to date
- Listen to our Inside Politics podcast for the best political chat and analysis
