It being boxing, albeit of the professional variety, it’s rarely safe to say “the result was never in doubt”, but still, you had half a notion our woman would be declared the victor on Saturday night after having the decidedly gutsy Milena Koleva on the back foot for the bulk of their eight two-minute rounds. And she was too, in some style:
“She remains undefeated . . . from Greeeeeeeeat Ireeeeeeland, Katieeeeee Taaaaaayloooooooooooor!”
Katie, making Ireland great again.
That’s four wins from four fights in four months, then, so she’s adjusting to the professional game rather nicely, or as our regular Sky commentating team of Adam Smith and Carl Froch might put it, she’s already Rocky Marciano, Sugar Ray Leonard and Muhammad Ali rolled in to one.
Rather excited
They’re very excited about Katie, are Adam and Carl, to the point where you’re sometimes left wondering if you’re watching the same bout as themselves. Or hearing the same noises emanating from the audience. A flavour:
Adam: "Here in the black and gold is the dazzling Katie Taylor! Her ringcraft and lightning combinations have already lit up the professional boxing world over the last four months!" Carl: "She's just got one thing on her mind, to seek and destroy!" Adam: "Isn't she exciting to watch!" Carl: "She's just ruthless with her assaults!" Adam: "Many believe she could become a global superstar attraction! She really is something very, very special!" Anyone would think they felt an obligation to hype these Sky bouts, rather than just describe them, but that would be cynical.
Adam introduced Katie’s opponent as the “world title challenger”, somewhat skipping over the fact that she was knocked out in said contest in January and has lost seven of her 17 fights. Carl was possibly aware of these stats when he suggested in the middle of round three that “we are slowly watching her fade in front of our very eyes”. So after she went the distance, Koleva should have sought him out at ringside and politely asked, “you were saying?”
Not gripped
Adam, meanwhile, was hearing things, suggesting the crowd was gripped by the contest, which really wasn’t true at all. The chatter levels suggesting they weren’t paying a great deal of attention, as is often the fate of an undercard bout, a sizeable portion of them fiddling with their phones or making their way to the toilets/bar.
“Not just a wonderful performance, but a thrilling one too! Really exciting the crowd!” And almost as soon as Adam said it, they began singing “Ooooh, Anthony Crolla” in anticipation of the night’s main event, while Katie and Milena were still slugging it out.
And after the result was declared. “Just listen to that reception, the crowd absolutely loved those eight rounds,” said Carl, after the ripple of applause from the audience. Your head would be sore from the scratching. And you’d guess no one would be more morto by it all than Katie Taylor.
Martin Brundle, we noted, was being accused of being a bit of a Comical Ali himself in the early hours of Sunday morning when he said of the Australian Grand Prix, “this was just the tonic Formula 1 needed!”. Mind you, Formula 1 fans on this side of the globe not only had to be up at 4:30am for the start of Sky’s coverage, they lost another hour of sleep with the clock change, so they were probably feeling crankier than usual.
By common consent, last season’s F1 was less than riveting, so all kinds of – technical term alert – fiddly things have been done to ensure this new one will be exhilarating. And Ferrari (Sebastian Vettel) beating Mercedes (Lewis Hamilton) in Melbourne was, apparently, a very good thing for the sport, Mercedes having been the Katie Taylor of Formula 1.
Still, some didn’t find it riveting at all, largely because of a distinct absence of overtaking, and therefore crash potential, but no one was more peeved with the race than Daniel Ricciardo. Ted Kravitz had some awful news about his gearbox before it even got started. “Apparently the drive-shaft went into the differential,” he told us, so that was our day ruined.
And then Daniel’s engine gave up the ghost on lap 25 and his message to his team over the radio was clear enough. “Let’s get the f*** out of here.”
Or as Adam and Carl might have described it, “unlucky there for Ricciardo, the new Ayrton Senna/Michael Schumacher/Fangio”.