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Amber Barrett: I want people to say ‘we want to win this game, so we need her on our team’

Experience of being in contention to be last-picked in a training game in Germany has stayed with the Donegal striker

Ireland’s Amber Barrett celebrates scoring her winning goal against Scotland by gesturing to the black armband worn in memory of those affected by the tragedy in Creeslough in her native Donegal. Photograph: Ryan Byrne/Inpho
Ireland’s Amber Barrett celebrates scoring her winning goal against Scotland by gesturing to the black armband worn in memory of those affected by the tragedy in Creeslough in her native Donegal. Photograph: Ryan Byrne/Inpho

As impressive off the field as she was on it on Tuesday evening, Amber Barrett left viewers in awe when she spoke so powerfully and eloquently about the tragedy that hit Creeslough, the home of her grandparents, so soon after her goal had sealed Ireland’s women their first qualification for the World Cup.

She’d have been forgiven if her focus had been on the most wonderful moment of her career, the road she’d had to travel to that point had, after all, been a long and, at times, testing one. But her thoughts were only for her native Donegal.

“This is the best day of my life, in terms of a football experience,” she said, “but, when you put it all into perspective, we don’t scratch the surface of what happened in Creeslough on Friday.

“There has been a sombreness about me the past few days. This result, this game, that goal ... I’m dedicating it to those 10 beautiful souls, who unfortunately perished on Friday. To all their families, because I know they touched their lives. They certainly touched ours. This is for Creeslough, this is for Donegal, this is for Ireland.”

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‘This night is for those 10 beautiful souls who died. This is for Creeslough. This is for Donegal’Opens in new window ]

Come Wednesday morning, when she spoke to Pat Kenny on Newstalk, the emotion of it all caught up with the 26-year-old when she broke down during her interview, explaining just how difficult the build-up to the game had been. “You just can’t look forward to a World Cup qualifier with that in the back of your head,” she said. “You can’t just head off to training and away you go and forget everything.”

Barrett, as smart as she is witty, has always thought deeply about life, accusing herself of sometimes overthinking things and second-guessing herself.

Amber Barrett admits she had a hard time initially after signing for FC Köln. Photograph: Christof Koepsel/Getty Images
Amber Barrett admits she had a hard time initially after signing for FC Köln. Photograph: Christof Koepsel/Getty Images

She signed her first professional contract back in 2019 when she joined German side FC Köln, the start of her time there difficult. She recalled one of her earliest training sessions with the club.

“We were playing 11 v 11 and the coach got two girls to pick the teams. Me and the wee Japanese girl [Yuka Hirano] were left. I remember thinking, going all the way back to school, that I had never, ever been last-picked.

“It was something so small, it wasn’t a personal thing, it wasn’t that they didn’t think I was good enough — they just didn’t know me, I was new. But in my head I told myself they didn’t think I was good enough, so I needed to show them that I was.

TV View: Amber Barrett’s beautiful gesture to Creeslough adds to emotion of special nightOpens in new window ]

“It was never a domineering moment in my career, it was something that was so small, but I overthink things, so I constantly refer back to it in my head. I want to be the first pick. I want people to say ‘we want to win this game, so we need her on our team’. That’s how I think about it now. I’ll throw myself about, I’ll get in the way, I’ll score goals. My attitude that day was, ‘you’re not going to pick me last again’.”

She stuck it out, though, and impressed sufficiently with Köln to earn a move to FFC Turbine Potsdam last summer. Potsdam are a former powerhouse in European football, winning the Champions League twice, and are intent on becoming a major force again.

During those early struggles in Germany she had resisted the temptation to return home, where she had been top scorer and player of the year with Peamount United in the National League. “My mum would say ‘you can always go back to Peamount, they’ll always be happy to have you back’, and I knew that would be the case — I might not get a game, but I think they’d take me back.

Amber Barrett in action for Donegal against Dublin in an All-Ireland quarter-final in 2016. Photograph: Tom Beary/Inpho
Amber Barrett in action for Donegal against Dublin in an All-Ireland quarter-final in 2016. Photograph: Tom Beary/Inpho

“But the longer you stay in the zone that’s uncomfortable the more you’ll come out and say ‘actually, today is better than yesterday’, suddenly then you begin to find your feet. So often we take the easy option, you just have to be willing to break out of your comfort zone and be uncomfortable for a while.”

By then, though, the Milford native had become accustomed to making difficult choices, not least when she decided to concentrate on football rather than trying to continue combining it with playing her beloved Gaelic football for her county. Before then, she’d also excelled in athletics, the 100m, 200m and long jump her specialities. But by that time she was doing her BA in Maynooth University, it all had become too much.

“I just found myself emotionally drained. Peamount game on a Saturday in Wexford, Donegal league game on a Sunday back home. There was no way that was going to work out. I hit a wall when I came down with glandular fever, it floored me for four to five weeks, that was just me trying to juggle everything while going into my final year in college. Training with Peamount, going home to train with Donegal, I actually didn’t have a life.”

Ireland likely to be among third seeds in World Cup drawOpens in new window ]

She went on to do a master’s in education in Dublin City University, English and History her specialist subjects, teaching for a spell in a school in Coolock as part of her course.

All the while, she dreamt of getting the chance to play professionally, not least to boost her hopes of nailing down a place in the Irish team, Barrett having made her debut under Colin Bell in September 2017. It was then that Köln came calling. And she’s been a professional ever since.

Needless to say, her burning ambition had always been to qualify for the World Cup with Ireland. Now, thanks to that goal, it’s mission accomplished. It’s an Irish sporting moment that will never be forgotten, no more than her beautiful tribute to the people of Creeslough.

You’d have a feeling she’ll never be ‘last-picked’ again.

Mary Hannigan

Mary Hannigan

Mary Hannigan is a sports writer with The Irish Times