The story of Ireland’s 1-0 defeat in Lisbon last month was bodies on the line in defence, hardly any bodies at all in attack. Really Ireland only played half a game – the defensive half – which, you could argue, was understandable in the circumstances.
Now it’s time for the return game, chasing what will likely be a four-point gap to Hungary at kick-off. These are different circumstances. But, as Heimir Hallgrímsson confirmed in the first few minutes of Wednesday’s press conference, “our approach is not going to change”.
“We need to play a certain style versus Portugal, whether we need a win or a draw,” the head coach explained. “We can’t go all-in against a team like Portugal, it’s not going to be a basketball match. And then we will take calculated risks if we need to score a goal later on in the game.”
What was that he said? “If we need to score a goal.”
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Steady, Heimir! We don’t want people thinking the manager is drunk on optimism and has completely lost the run of himself.
“If we need to score.”
So the flowchart of Ireland’s game plan apparently includes a box marked “Do we need to score a goal?”, with “Yes” and “No” arrows pointing out of it. Having embarrassed ourselves with the overconfidence of early September, we have now plunged into a sordid and shameful orgy of humility. Why can’t we ever be normal?
Portugal, while being a hugely experienced side full of class players and plainly much better than Ireland, are not some invincible Borg-like entity who cannot be scored against. Hungary scored four times against them in two games. “We’ve looked at those goals,” Hallgrímsson said, “and they all tell the same story, so you go analyse.”
The goals Hungary scored against Portugal were all close-range first-time finishes from crosses into the box. Three of them were headers and one of those was from a corner. Maybe that suggests a certain susceptibility to crosses, but if you want to test that, you must first work your way into the areas of the pitch you might realistically cross from. In Lisbon, Ireland hardly ever did that.
We set out to get a 0-0 and the ultra-conservative approach yielded only two shots, neither of which were on target. Portugal had 30 shots and scored the winner with the 29th.
When Hungary went to Lisbon, they took a radically different approach. They had a real go. In a game of 37 shots, Hungary had 17. Where Ireland had managed only four crosses, Hungary fired in 20. Their reward was a 2-2 draw. Maybe there’s something to be said for basketball – at least compared to bull-baiting, or whatever the Portugal-Ireland game was.
At least in a home match the referee might give us an occasional free-kick to stick in the mixer. In Lisbon, the referee seemed dazzled by the presence nearby of Cristiano Ronaldo (who told Piers Morgan last week that he is the most famous man alive – more famous than Donald Trump).
The ref gave Ireland only one free-kick inside Portugal’s half and even that was right next to the centre circle. That, plus zero corners, plus our unwillingness to ever throw more than three players forward in open play, adds up to not many chances to test Portugal’s potential vulnerability to crosses.
We must admit that the referees in the two Dublin games so far have done a tremendous job, sending off opposing players in the 52nd minute in both matches. Some mysterious vibration in the Dublin air drove Hungary’s Roland Sallai and Armenia’s Tigran Barseghyan to commit senseless acts of violence under the nose of the referees. And if one of the Portuguese succumbs to the same wild impulse, then who knows what could happen.
In 76 minutes playing against 10 men, Ireland have scored twice and conceded none. In those circumstances, we look like a team with a chance of making the playoffs. If you count only the 284 minutes of 11 against 11, Ireland have scored two and conceded five, losing three of the games and drawing 0-0 against Armenia.
As is so often the case, we are reduced to hoping the superior spiritual qualities of our people will help somehow. “I hope the support will be Irish, and I know it will be – hopefully we can use that to be more confident in possession,” Hallgrímsson said. He added that the role of the crowd will be “huge, like always. I think our record is quite good at home, so long may that continue”.
Our record at home under Hallgrímsson is three wins and two defeats from seven. It’s a bit better than the two wins and four defeats from seven away games, though hardly chalk and cheese. Maybe cheese and slightly harder cheese.
The last home game, against Armenia, featured one of the strangest atmospheres in a while. That low hum of conversation you heard throughout the first 45 was the sound of trust issues between the crowd and the team. There was even booing at half-time – at 0-0!
The Dublin crowd will surely put on a better show against Portugal, if only to impress the most famous man alive. Few expect the night to become another great Irish story, but at least we get to be scenery in his.
