On the Premiership: The only thing harder than knowing when to arrive at a party is sensing when to leave it. Yesterday, the music finally stopped in the Premiership and everywhere you looked, there were goodbyes: some heartfelt, some understated and some resentful, but all characterised by clumsiness.

The farewell dates for Alan Curbishley, Alan Shearer and Highbury have been set for some time but long-laid plans have a habit of going awry. Curbishley' s 720th and final Charlton game ended in a crushing defeat while Shearer saluted the Gallowgate for the last time on crutches rather than in his beloved black and white stripes. Arsenal did give their wonderful old home a boisterous send-off, but even that was tainted by the fear that Thierry Henry was also taking his leave for the final time.

The most awkward parting of all, however, had not been scripted. Three hours before Manchester United were due to walk out against Charlton, Ruud van Nistelrooy climbed into his car, threw in his kit bag and sped home, peeved at Alex Ferguson's decision to leave him on the bench and plump instead for the teenager Giuseppe Rossi.

Ferguson later suggested that a series of behind-the-scenes tantrums had affected the club's "spirit", and the chances are that van Nistelrooy will never reappear in United's colours.

Players who dare to cock a snook at the Scot's authority do not generally remain on his payroll, and crowd popularity in no way guarantees survival.

Indeed, Ferguson rarely permits United's favourites to choreograph their own exits. Paul Ince was packed off to Italy a year after he helped the club to their first domestic title for 26 years; Jaap Stam was unceremoniously kicked up Matt Busby Way for daring to criticise the manager in his autobiography; even Roy Keane, Ferguson's most trusted lieutenant, was not permitted a dignified departure.

And now van Nistelrooy. The Dutchman was first piqued when he was left on the bench for February's English League Cup final against Wigan, prompting a barrage of rather unkind "Why the long face?" remarks.

Louis Saha was preferred in his stead and van Nistelrooy's equine features have grown more pronounced with every menacing display delivered by his strike rival.

If this sulky strop was van Nistelrooy's final act for Manchester United, it is a pity. His record - a jaw-dropping goal every one-and-a-half games in the Premiership and 39 strikes in 47 European matches - deserved a more distinguished send-off.

Yet for all his undeniable class, van Nistelrooy remains an acquired taste outside the Stretford End. He does not have the balletic grace of Henry or the thunderous, thumping power of Wayne Rooney. He is not quick and rarely beats his man with a twist or a turn.

Almost all his goals have been snaffled inside the penalty area. And then there is his penchant for the more sinister side of the striker's art, which Arsene Wenger so infamously branded "cheating" after a particularly tempestuous afternoon in 2004.

But in an age where managers prefer their charges to be genuine all-rounders - witness Rooney's tireless runs back into his own half to assist his defenders, or Henry's eagerness to forage for scraps out wide - van Nistelrooy has remained resolutely, magnificently, a goalscorer, with the achievements of the team secondary to his own striking feats.

In the past, Ferguson has had cause to be grateful for van Nistelrooy's selfish streak. When he signed him on his 25th birthday in 2001, United were like an ornate dagger with a blunted edge: pretty, but ultimately pointless.

Teddy Sheringham had top-scored the previous year with 21 goals but by the end of his first season, the new boy had doubled that total and helped United win back their Premiership crown.

This club, which has been graced with such extraordinary striking talents through the years, had never seen anything like him.

So the fact that van Nistelrooy's ruthlessness and unflinching appreciation of his own worth - the very traits which so impressed Ferguson when he first met him in Eindhoven six years ago - now seems to have led him into irreconcilable conflict with his manager is accompanied by a twinge of irony.

But perhaps a parting was inevitable. Van Nistelrooy should not have reacted in such a petulant fashion to his dropping yesterday but it must be galling for one of the finest forwards of his generation to be supplanted by a trainee making his full league debut. Old Trafford may boast luxury padded benches, but van Nistelrooy will never be comfortable sitting on them.

So he joins other behemoths such as Dennis Bergkamp, Roy Keane and Alan Shearer in making this season their Premiership swan-song.

Van Nistelrooy will have no shortage of suitors, but perhaps he will one day reflect on his fit of pique and regret the fact that he never said goodbye.